The Business Everyone Says You Should Want
You're building a business you don't even want. And you know it.
You're sitting at another wedding reception, staring at your plate. Chicken, beef, or fish—those were your options. You chose chicken because it seemed safest, but now you're watching the woman next to you cut into what looks like perfectly seasoned salmon and wondering if you should have gone with the fish instead.
The woman across from you got the beef and keeps glancing longingly at your chicken. Nobody seems particularly thrilled with what they got, but everyone's making the best of it because, well, these were the options.
And suddenly it hits you: this is exactly what happened with your business dreams.
The Participation Trophy Economy
Let's start with the uncomfortable truth: "six figures" became the participation trophy of entrepreneurship.
Everyone's celebrating hitting $100K like they just won the Olympics, when that's barely enough to replace a decent corporate salary after you factor in taxes, health insurance, and the fact that you're now working 80 hours a week instead of 40.
But we all nod along and congratulate each other because admitting that six figures isn't actually life-changing money would mean acknowledging that most of us are building expensive hobbies, not businesses.
The World-Changing Delusion
Then there's everyone who's "changing the world" but nobody can explain how.
Ask them what specific problem they're solving and you get word salad about "empowering women to step into their power" or "helping conscious entrepreneurs align with their purpose." Ask them to show you measurable impact and they'll redirect to their follower count or testimonials about how someone "felt seen."
Meanwhile, the actual world-changers are busy solving real problems and don't have time to post about it every day.
The Lifestyle Prison
And don't get me started on the lifestyle business that's actually a prison of constant content creation.
You know the ones—posting three times a day about their "freedom" while being more tied to their phones than any corporate employee ever was. They can "work from anywhere" as long as anywhere has perfect lighting for their content and reliable wifi for their live streams.
They traded a boss for an algorithm and convinced themselves it's liberation.
The Broke and Bitter Brigade
Then we have the heart-centered entrepreneurs who are broke and bitter but won't admit it.
They're "following their passion" and "serving from the heart" while secretly resenting every client who doesn't pay premium rates for their life-changing work. They can't understand why the universe isn't rewarding their pure intentions with abundance.
But mentioning money makes them uncomfortable because they've convinced themselves that caring about profit somehow makes them less authentic.
The Cultural Conditioning Menu
Here's what actually happened: Society handed you a business success menu with three pre-approved options, and you picked one without asking if any of them were what you actually wanted.
Option 1: The Lifestyle Business
Work from anywhere, passive income streams, digital nomad freedom. What they don't tell you: "passive" income requires active maintenance, and freedom without structure is just organized chaos.
Option 2: The Empire Builder
Multi-million dollar revenue, team of 50+, speaking on big stages. What they don't tell you: most people hate managing people, and building an empire you don't want to run is just creating your own corporate hell.
Option 3: The Heart-Centered Entrepreneur
Purpose-driven mission, changing the world, building community. What they don't tell you: good intentions don't pay bills, and martyrdom isn't a business model.
You looked at the menu and picked one. Not because it's what you wanted, but because it's what you thought you should want based on your personality type, values, or what looked good in other people's Instagram stories.
The Swapping Game
And now you're playing the swapping game, trying to trade your mediocre chicken for someone else's equally mediocre fish.
The lifestyle entrepreneurs are secretly envying the empire builders' recognition. The empire builders are looking longingly at the heart-centered entrepreneurs' sense of purpose. The heart-centered ones are wondering how the lifestyle people seem so carefree about money.
Everyone's miserable, but nobody wants to admit they chose wrong because that would mean starting over.
The Real Problem
Here's the brutal truth: when you build a business around what you think you should want instead of what you actually want, you lack the fight you need to make it work.
Success isn't a smorgasbord where you can try everything. It isn't even a degustation where someone curates the perfect experience. It's a three-option wedding menu, and if you don't like what you chose, your only solution is to keep looking around hoping someone else got something better.
But when it gets hard—and it always gets hard—you won't have the sustained motivation to push through. Because deep down, you're building someone else's dream with your own life.
The lifestyle entrepreneur will give up when she realizes freedom without challenge is just expensive boredom. The empire builder will burn out when he discovers he's created a monster he doesn't want to feed. The heart-centered entrepreneur will quit when she accepts that impact without income is just volunteer work with delusions of grandeur.
The Rebellion
What if you refused the menu entirely?
What if instead of picking from the culturally approved options, you asked yourself what business would actually make you excited to get out of bed every morning?
Maybe you want the intellectual challenge of building something complex but also the flexibility to take three-day weekends. Maybe you want to make serious money AND create meaningful impact without apologizing for either. Maybe you want recognition for your expertise but not the burden of managing a huge team.
Maybe your version of success doesn't fit into any of their neat little categories.
The Fight You Actually Need
When you're building something you truly want—not something you think you should want—everything changes.
You'll work late not because you have to prove your dedication, but because you genuinely can't wait to see what happens next. You'll push through obstacles not because you're supposed to be resilient, but because giving up would mean losing something that actually matters to you.
You'll stop playing the swapping game because you'll finally understand that you were never meant to choose from their limited menu in the first place.
Your Custom Order
The business you actually want might be weird. It might not fit into the lifestyle/empire/heart-centered trinity. It might make other entrepreneurs ask uncomfortable questions about their own choices.
And that's exactly why it will work.
Because while everyone else is fighting over the same three mediocre options, you'll be building something that's genuinely yours. Something that excites you enough to sustain the years of effort it takes to create anything extraordinary.
The Question That Changes Everything
So here it is: If you could design your business without any reference to what the gurus say you should want, what would it actually look like?
Not the lifestyle business everyone says ambitious women should want. Not the empire everyone says proves you've made it. Not the heart-centered mission everyone says validates your worth as a human being.
Your business. Built around what YOU actually want. Designed for how you actually work. Created for the life you actually want to live.
That's not on any cultural menu. That's something you have to discover for yourself.
But once you do? You'll finally have something worth fighting for instead of something you're just supposed to want.
Ready to stop pretending you're happy with the chicken?
You're building a business you don't even want. And you know it.
You're sitting at another wedding reception, staring at your plate. Chicken, beef, or fish—those were your options. You chose chicken because it seemed safest, but now you're watching the woman next to you cut into what looks like perfectly seasoned salmon and wondering if you should have gone with the fish instead.
The woman across from you got the beef and keeps glancing longingly at your chicken. Nobody seems particularly thrilled with what they got, but everyone's making the best of it because, well, these were the options.
And suddenly it hits you: this is exactly what happened with your business dreams.
The Participation Trophy Economy
Let's start with the uncomfortable truth: "six figures" became the participation trophy of entrepreneurship.
Everyone's celebrating hitting $100K like they just won the Olympics, when that's barely enough to replace a decent corporate salary after you factor in taxes, health insurance, and the fact that you're now working 80 hours a week instead of 40.
But we all nod along and congratulate each other because admitting that six figures isn't actually life-changing money would mean acknowledging that most of us are building expensive hobbies, not businesses.
The World-Changing Delusion
Then there's everyone who's "changing the world" but nobody can explain how.
Ask them what specific problem they're solving and you get word salad about "empowering women to step into their power" or "helping conscious entrepreneurs align with their purpose." Ask them to show you measurable impact and they'll redirect to their follower count or testimonials about how someone "felt seen."
Meanwhile, the actual world-changers are busy solving real problems and don't have time to post about it every day.
The Lifestyle Prison
And don't get me started on the lifestyle business that's actually a prison of constant content creation.
You know the ones—posting three times a day about their "freedom" while being more tied to their phones than any corporate employee ever was. They can "work from anywhere" as long as anywhere has perfect lighting for their content and reliable wifi for their live streams.
They traded a boss for an algorithm and convinced themselves it's liberation.
The Broke and Bitter Brigade
Then we have the heart-centered entrepreneurs who are broke and bitter but won't admit it.
They're "following their passion" and "serving from the heart" while secretly resenting every client who doesn't pay premium rates for their life-changing work. They can't understand why the universe isn't rewarding their pure intentions with abundance.
But mentioning money makes them uncomfortable because they've convinced themselves that caring about profit somehow makes them less authentic.
The Cultural Conditioning Menu
Here's what actually happened: Society handed you a business success menu with three pre-approved options, and you picked one without asking if any of them were what you actually wanted.
Option 1: The Lifestyle Business
Work from anywhere, passive income streams, digital nomad freedom. What they don't tell you: "passive" income requires active maintenance, and freedom without structure is just organized chaos.
Option 2: The Empire Builder
Multi-million dollar revenue, team of 50+, speaking on big stages. What they don't tell you: most people hate managing people, and building an empire you don't want to run is just creating your own corporate hell.
Option 3: The Heart-Centered Entrepreneur
Purpose-driven mission, changing the world, building community. What they don't tell you: good intentions don't pay bills, and martyrdom isn't a business model.
You looked at the menu and picked one. Not because it's what you wanted, but because it's what you thought you should want based on your personality type, values, or what looked good in other people's Instagram stories.
The Swapping Game
And now you're playing the swapping game, trying to trade your mediocre chicken for someone else's equally mediocre fish.
The lifestyle entrepreneurs are secretly envying the empire builders' recognition. The empire builders are looking longingly at the heart-centered entrepreneurs' sense of purpose. The heart-centered ones are wondering how the lifestyle people seem so carefree about money.
Everyone's miserable, but nobody wants to admit they chose wrong because that would mean starting over.
The Real Problem
Here's the brutal truth: when you build a business around what you think you should want instead of what you actually want, you lack the fight you need to make it work.
Success isn't a smorgasbord where you can try everything. It isn't even a degustation where someone curates the perfect experience. It's a three-option wedding menu, and if you don't like what you chose, your only solution is to keep looking around hoping someone else got something better.
But when it gets hard—and it always gets hard—you won't have the sustained motivation to push through. Because deep down, you're building someone else's dream with your own life.
The lifestyle entrepreneur will give up when she realizes freedom without challenge is just expensive boredom. The empire builder will burn out when he discovers he's created a monster he doesn't want to feed. The heart-centered entrepreneur will quit when she accepts that impact without income is just volunteer work with delusions of grandeur.
The Rebellion
What if you refused the menu entirely?
What if instead of picking from the culturally approved options, you asked yourself what business would actually make you excited to get out of bed every morning?
Maybe you want the intellectual challenge of building something complex but also the flexibility to take three-day weekends. Maybe you want to make serious money AND create meaningful impact without apologizing for either. Maybe you want recognition for your expertise but not the burden of managing a huge team.
Maybe your version of success doesn't fit into any of their neat little categories.
The Fight You Actually Need
When you're building something you truly want—not something you think you should want—everything changes.
You'll work late not because you have to prove your dedication, but because you genuinely can't wait to see what happens next. You'll push through obstacles not because you're supposed to be resilient, but because giving up would mean losing something that actually matters to you.
You'll stop playing the swapping game because you'll finally understand that you were never meant to choose from their limited menu in the first place.
Your Custom Order
The business you actually want might be weird. It might not fit into the lifestyle/empire/heart-centered trinity. It might make other entrepreneurs ask uncomfortable questions about their own choices.
And that's exactly why it will work.
Because while everyone else is fighting over the same three mediocre options, you'll be building something that's genuinely yours. Something that excites you enough to sustain the years of effort it takes to create anything extraordinary.
The Question That Changes Everything
So here it is: If you could design your business without any reference to what the gurus say you should want, what would it actually look like?
Not the lifestyle business everyone says ambitious women should want. Not the empire everyone says proves you've made it. Not the heart-centered mission everyone says validates your worth as a human being.
Your business. Built around what YOU actually want. Designed for how you actually work. Created for the life you actually want to live.
That's not on any cultural menu. That's something you have to discover for yourself.
But once you do? You'll finally have something worth fighting for instead of something you're just supposed to want.
Ready to stop pretending you're happy with the chicken?
Do You Want to Know What is Missing?
When you feel like you are doing everything right - and business still isn't taking off....
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